Live Your Ideal Life Today
The Future Never Arrives
I trained (twice) as a Life Coach to help you set goals and create your ideal life. And that’s often how I think about my job in terms of my marketing and how I talk about what I do.
For example: “I help people bypass doubt and bring more of who they are into their life and work”. Except, increasingly, I have become uncomfortable with that. Because the focus is so much in the future, as if the present were something we needed to get away from.
And I guess that’s in part because of all the marketing hype that is aimed at life coaches (lol) It’s partly because I have somehow learned marketing speak as if it were a foreign language and now that’s my default whenever I think of talking about what I do. And partly because up until fairly recently, parts of my life were unfulfilling and only creating my ideal life, getting to some future utopia, was gonna help.
I’ve come to see that this isn’t a healthy way to look at things. A natural shift is occurring. And that shift is fuelled by seeing that life is all made up in our heads. Our reality is only what we think it is. If we see rejection as a reason to be miserable we will be miserable. If we see it as part of the rich tapestry of life and nothing to worry about, we might just shrug it off and move onto the next thing. Exact same outside circumstance, completely different inside experience.
Which led me to thinking about our ideal life. What is that? When is that?
It’s an abstract concept. You can’t touch it. What if there’s always just one more thing you need before you’re living your ideal life? Before you can really let yourself be happy. How can you know when it’s complete? It’s always in the future. And the future never arrives.
Instead let’s think about making a choice in each moment.
The authentic, in integrity, right for you, scary, comfortable, exciting choice.
I’m not sure that I’m quite out of the habit yet of talking about helping people create their dream life. I still see it as a valuable thing to do as a life coach. But there’s a step before that, or maybe in parallel with it. And that’s to support people as they recognise that there is nothing wrong with them. They have innate mental health and wellbeing and unlimited creative potential.
How much more fun to create from a sense of possibility than from a sense of lack.
So I don’t care today if you choose easy or hard, comfortable or scary, black or white, up or down, yes or no.
All I care about is that you choose. Make your choice. Your choice.
Stop living on auto-pilot. Stop letting your inner critic talk you out of stuff. Stop worrying about what other people think.
Now you’re already living your ideal life without having to change a damn thing.
And all those hopes and dreams?
Nothing wrong with following your heart and going after all those goals. But now you’re doing it because those things are just nice to have. Not because they’re gonna make you feel you better about yourself or make you happy.
Choose Possibility. Choose Joy.