Ep 2: An Introduction to Being Quietly Bohemian part two

This was going to be Episode 2, but really it seems more like Episode 1A!  We’re taking a quick look at what makes up a podcast for introverts, by an introvert, but that’s not about being an introvert. So if you liked the introduction and you think you’re ready for just a little bit more of the same this is for you.

We also take a peek into what the first season of Quietly Bohemian will be about. Hint: it involves Depeche Mode!

I didn’t mention them in the podcast, but if you’d like some resources for understanding introversion and high sensitivity and thus coming to accept and love, rather than fight or hide who we are, I recommend that you check out these books and websites:

Quiet by Susan Cain and her website.

and

The Highly Sensitive Person by Dr Elaine Aron and her website.

Full Interview Transcript

(scroll to the bottom if you'd prefer to download the transcript)

QUIETLY BOHEMIAN Episode 2 (or 1A!): Introduction to Being Quietly Bohemian part two

Welcome to Quietly Bohemian, the podcast for introvert and highly sensitive people with Big Dreams, where we look at turning away from your inner critic and towards your inner wisdom so you do your thing, your way, in your own time and live life true to yourself. I’m your host, Laura Li, Transformational Life Coach. You can find out more about me and living life your way at quietlybohemian.com

This was going to be Episode 2, but now I’ve listened to it, it seems more like Episode 1A.  We’re taking a quick look at what makes up a podcast for introverts, by an introvert, but that’s not about being an introvert. So if you liked the introduction and you think you’re ready for just a little bit more of the same this is for you.

Welcome to Episode 2 of Quietly Bohemian. If you listened to the first episode and you've come back this week, then thank you very much. I’m really excited to have you here. And if you're taking the Bohemian attitude of jumping right in at episode 2 then welcome to you as well.

But if you did listen to last week's episode, you'll have heard me talking about how I can often get flustered and forget what I want to say in the heat of the moment when there are cameras on or microphones pointing at me and there were a couple of things that I wish I'd gone into slightly more detail about in the last episode and I toyed with the idea of whether to go back over them or to just move on.

And it doesn't really matter which way I chose, my inner critic was kind of wanting me to think whichever way I went would be the wrong way and one of the reasons I was persuaded to actually start this podcast, even though I really thought this is not something I will be naturally good at, is because I was told by my teacher that it's your podcast you can do whatever you want.

And I hope this will be an inspiration for people to do just that. For people to do what they want and for it to be that inspiration. I think it also has to be a display of me doing what I want and it is an experiment in many ways. I don't even know really what a professional podcast would be. But somehow I feel that this isn't necessarily it!

I have all sorts of ideas forming around in my head as to whether or not it will be successful. However I might measure that but it is really important for me, in taking on this adventure, that I am true to myself and true to my word and following my inspiration and seeing where that takes me.

So at every turn where I'm tempted to manage the image of this and manage my own image to come across as more together or more professional or more successful - I am making a concerted effort to not do that so that you can see, and so that I can see myself, but so that you can see that it is true. We don't have to behave in a certain way and I could add the rider we don't have to behave in a certain way to be successful or to be happy. But I guess it really is just we don't have to behave in a certain way and we can do whatever we feel inspired to do in the moment.

So all of that is really a long-winded way of saying even though I feel it isn't really the done thing with podcasts to say: Oh, I don't think I actually said everything I wanted to last week, so let's just go back to that. That is exactly what I am going to. So I hope that's okay with you and you're still with me.

One of the things I worry about a little bit when I talk about coaching introverts and highly sensitive people around living life true to themselves and feeling self-doubt is that I know it isn't just us who experiences self-doubt overwhelm or confusion and. It isn't just introverts who feel under pressure to present themselves to the world in a way that doesn't feel natural or authentic for them.

But I often find the world an unwelcoming and unaccommodating place in specific ways. And so first and foremost. I definitely want to create a safe friendly non-judgmental place for introvert and highly sensitive people.

So you have somewhere to go where you can just be yourself without having to censor yourself manage your image or try and fit someone else's perception of what's acceptable. And that safety includes the way in which you're being coached and supported and that really is a key thing for me.

But because I want to have my cake and eat it, I am including any kindred free spirits who like what they're hearing and feel this could be a home for them, too.

What I really wanted to say last week and forgot was that although this is a podcast for introverts by an introvert. It is not about being an introvert.  As if that is something to fix or overcome.  I'm coaching you on Being Human in a way that supports you especially if you are an introvert or highly sensitive.

So this is the place for you if Being Human means needing more time to process things more thinking time. If you prefer to approach people in writing rather than face-to-face or over the telephone.

I saw a cartoon on Facebook recently and it was I don't know, I guess, it's an extrovert the yellow man and the introvert was the blue man. And the yellow man is saying “go ahead make the call” and the blue man says “I'll send an email” and now the yellow man is getting a little bit frantic “but a call would be so much quicker” and the blue man is saying I’ll send a text as well”. Now the yellow guy is really freaking out and getting quite irate “just make the call!” and the blue man is now actually shaking and getting a little bit anxious and he's saying, “I'll send another email”. So if that's you, this is definitely the right space.

If Being Human for you means that you come out in hives when you hear the words take Massive Action; and the idea of being an overachiever or Playing Big makes you shudder even though you know you are capable of so much more, if you're what I call a gifted underachiever; and if you don't want to do a bunch of exhausting mindset and manifesting work; if you don't want to work on your self-belief; and if you don't want to feel the fear and do it anyway, this is also the place for you.

If you don't want any of that, any of that hustley, go now, go faster and maybe if you're not even sure of what your big dream is, or if your big dream is to just let go of the perfectionism and people-pleasing to stop being afraid there's only one way to do things, and it surely isn't your way, and to embrace all of who you really are and live life true to yourself, then we are speaking the same language.

So I'm here supporting you setting your own pace for how quickly you want to go. And if you're contemplating a step that's too scary or it's just not right for you - let's say it's going to the gym three times a week, wearing brighter colors, doing Facebook lives or telling your friends you're a bit woo woo, that is okay. In fact, it's more than okay. It's perfect because you're perfect. Just the way you are.

I am not going to be like the many coaches and assorted others who told me over the years that I have confidence or self-esteem issues. I am going to say that step feels too scary?  What feels right? What feels good?  And we will listen to the doubt and fear. We will respect the inner critic and the ego doing their job trying to keep us safe. And then we're going to delve underneath that to your inner wisdom, to your intuition and to the part of you that knows your truth and we’ll ask him or her what the next step is because she always knows.

Always.

And when I say coaching, I'm not just talking about if we're in a one-to-one or group coaching relationship.  If you're reading my blog, receiving my newsletter or giving your time to listen to this podcast then you are a Quiet Bohemian and you're receiving my coaching.

So now let's look a little bit deeper at something else from the last episode and that's what Bohemian means and I confess I've hijacked this word a little bit.  It means following an unconventional life often in creative or artistic ways. And whilst you might have some traditionally creative endeavor like dancing or painting or a project that you're trying to get off the ground, I like the idea of us being creative and artistic with our lives.  So not following our default setting or the default path in front of us, but consciously creating our life. I know we can't control the results, but we can open yourself up to possibility and take inspired action towards our dreams.

I see us as active and creative and responsible and not victims and reactive and responsive.  The artistic directors of our lives even, directing our attention where we want it to go and directing our action to what we want to do. But the most important thing for me is always in pursuing those dreams in living your life are you being true to yourself? Are you doing what you want in the way that you want? I support people coming out of hiding and bringing more of who they are into their life and work.

And so that wraps up our little follow up from the previous episode. And I know as I say that I've been repeating myself a little bit from last week and also I’ve] just been talking at you for a little while. So now it's your time to do some work before I go. Let me ask you if you knew it was okay to do whatever you wanted (because it is) no matter how small it is, or how big - we are not sizeist here - What would you do?  Really think about that. And if you feel like it, you can email me at Laura at quietlybohemian.com and let me know. I would love to hear from you.

Finally, let us look ahead to what the coming weeks will bring. Before this podcast was called Quietly Bohemian. It was called Conversations for the Masses. And it was a little joke based on the Depeche Mode album Music for the Masses, which was called that because it was most definitely not commercial music that would apply to the masses. And in a similar vein I don't really suppose that this little podcast will appeal to the masses and of course, I like to bring Depeche Mode into the conversation whenever I can.

I had to let go of that idea really because I felt as much as being Quietly Bohemian is taking some explaining, Conversations for the Masses would just take so much more. But I can't let go of the idea completely. So I have decided that Conversations for the Masses will be essentially the first season of this podcast and it will cover the next 10 episodes. So each week the conversation will be based around a title of a Depeche Mode song.  I haven't given much thought at this stage as to what those 10 songs will be but I can guarantee that Enjoy the Silence, People are People and Walking in My Shoes will be in there.

The words of Martin Gore have had a big impact on me and I think it's quite playful to take his words and have a look at them in the context of living a life true to ourselves.

And even more than that, it's a shameful attempt at catching Martin Gore’s attention and I do hope that he will come on this show at some point as one of my Quietly Bohemian guests. There, I've said it. It's out there.

And that’s the end of episode 2 or 1A, whichever way you want to look at it. Thanks for listening. If you have a moment to leave a comment or hit a rating for the show on iTunes I really do appreciate it and it will help other people find the podcast.

Next week we’ll start Conversations for The Masses looking at See You, the first Depeche Mode single written by Martin Gore and released in April 1982. In the meantime you can find out more and connect with me at my website quietlybohemian.com. Thanks again for listening.

 

 

Download the transcript